I have the massive fucking urge to shop. I wanna dwindle my life savings on impulsive and novelty purchases. At the moment, I dont care about being future financially stable, I have no committed plans of investment. But who am I to destroy the goals of someone I once was and perhaps put myself in a dead end in the future. I want to be a buyer for a retail company, I wanna travel the world and be inspired by fashion then bring it back to Melbourne. I wanna be a visual merchandiser for the Myer basement. I wanna be a personal shopper/stylist. I could do it for free because i would be rewarded with the fun of it. I feel that my employment right now puts me in a good position to achieve these goals but patience for greatness is never my thing. I'm a now person.
It's 9:36pm on a Sunday night at phuongs house. I feel suddenly excited for nothing in particular. What am I excited about? I could be excited to start work tomorrow, to get my work done, have my input heard, see how our sales are going, talk to the girls about our weekends. A couple days til my favourite manager comes back from her holidays and the workplace will be filled with sunshine again. I could be excited about finishing at 1pm and being let free to roam the city. Help me so that I will not buy anything. I could be excited about my holiday in 12 days and getting a tattoo that will be with me for the rest of my life. I'm anxious to feel the pain, once I was scared of it but now I think I'm craving for it. I realise the pain is part of the process and those who cannot withstand the pain don't deserve a tattoo. I've been fascinated with tattoos since I was in primary school, I deserve it more than ever and I've waited so long to let my fear control me. I considering to bungy jump 200m in Hong Kong.. although am scared. I'm excited for the adrenaline.
I'm excited for nothing in particular because I've been browsing fashion blogs and being inspired. It's amazing what a little of inspiration can make you feel. I just need to put my inspiration to good use instead of keeping it at 'excitement'.
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